It’s been an emotional week since I wrote Endings & New Beginnings last week. From having a weekend away painting with my inner muse, to returning home to the death of my youngest brother, I’ve experienced what I believe is the entire range of emotions possible. Thank you for your outpouring of love and caring sent to us during this time of healing.
I am no stranger to death and loss as it’s met me many times in life already. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. It’s emotionally draining and physically exhausting. We don’t know what to say or do…sometimes we say the wrong thing or nothing because we’re lost. It’s just plain hard.
Something beautiful I’ve observed is when we hear about someones loss we recall a loss of our own. This can help us identify not only our own feelings, but allows us to get a little closer to understanding what another person might be feeling. Yet no two experiences through loss are the same, and all are valid.
I feel strongly it is important how we share difficult news. For me, when someone dies it isn’t ‘bad’ news, it is ‘sad’ news. I try not to use bad because it seems to give death a negative association. We cannot be happy all the time, and sadness is a natural response to loss, as is anger and everything in between. Difficult emotions are uncomfortable. It’s that simple.
When we receive sad news some of us want to withdraw and isolate ourselves to heal. Others want to move, to be active, or be surrounded by others they trust. Sometimes we need a mix. It’s hard to know what to do for others during such a sensitive time.
I believe there is a synchronicity in life. That nothing is unfolding or ‘happening’ by coincidence. Understanding why things happen as they do is less meaningful to me personally than understanding how and what I feel, how I can connect with those around me, and how I can be of service based on what I have and am learning. The hardest thing for me continues to be witnessing the anguish and indescribable sorrow in others, especially children, as I feel utterly helpless even though I know I am doing the best I can, and it is not up to me to ‘take their pain away’. I’ve learned not to say too much, but rather to acknowledge, listen, love and allow…..and that can be incredibly hard to do.
Our weekly Insights are planned months in advance so I found myself smiling warmly as I discovered this
weeks Insight is Harmony & Health.
Harmony is associated with the heart centre…as is grief. Harmony brings us balanced inner well-being, as harmony is easily associated with music and sound. These are powerful healers that can give us the ‘background’ to feel. Wherever you are on your life journey, ALLOW. Allow yourself to feel, to soar with sound and heal with harmony.
Regina Kaiser
